T W E L V E months… of you becoming the most social and sweet baby. Your entire body still shows all that you feel in your heart. We love that about you. And teeth, girl!!! For alllll of last month you had the silliest snaggle tooth grin. Seeing your wide-mouth grin made me laugh out loud every single day. You’re such a ball of joy. Happy 12 months, baby girl.
I’ve been getting a lot of DM’s on my instagram from you girls who are feeling super lost which I can obviously relate to since I’ve been sharing my own feelings in these last few blog posts HERE + HERE. Maybe you’re stuck in funk, too? I’ll dive in to those feeling in this post AND in another one coming later this week! Especially the struggle to commit to self-care through exercise and what makes success happen even with my crazy + busy + mom life. It’s important to plan your day with purpose and I’ll share how I do mine. Want to change your behavior, too? Then change your mindset and perspective.
After the 12 month picture she nursed and passed out. xo
Since she was tiny, every time she nurses she’s always played with my necklace that has my babies initials.
You have changed so much this last month. You’re zipping around with crawling. But you definitely prefer to be at my side. And I’ve melted into that role. Accepting that I can’t get nearly anything done because you just love to be in my arms or fussing at me to go to sleep. You nurse 5 times each day, long and thin. Love foods some days and hate it other days. But these past few weeks have been especially difficult with teething. Most of the days and nights you were miserable. You’ve certainly been my most painful teething baby. It’s heartbreaking and exhausting all at the same time. Your front, stubborn tooth wasn’t coming in for the longest time until I saw blood on your blanket and cheek. NO WONDER YOU’VE BEEN SO ANGRY. Poor sweet girl, you made teething look real painful. But you’ve also turned into the cutest social butterfly. You learned how to wave and have been flapping that hand to anyone and everyone and holding it out for them to touch your tiny fingers. Nearly everywhere I go I can always look down and you’re smiling from ear to ear at the person standing next to us. And it ALWAYS brings a smile to their face and they just have to hold your little hand. It’s funny to imagine that baby’s have that magic over us. Babies are just. so. pure.
Last week was a rollercoaster. My littlest baby turned 1 year old. The night before her birthday rough. If I ever hold a baby again, it won’t be mine. Ugh, that stings. But boy am I lucky to have held 4 of my own. And even 2 at one time (twin newborns will always be my unicorn experience). But as the sting comes I’ll turn towards new feelings of gratitude and abundance for all the amazing blessings in my life. I’d hate to miss out on the things I have now because I’m aching for what I’ve lost. Anyways, yes that fertility ship confidently sailed. And no, we’re not having surgery again to change our minds <wink wink>. Here’s the truth with having more kids, when you know, you know. Physically and emotionally I’m doing so so good. I still see WAY too many aspects of my heart that I want to actively improve on. If you’ve been following along in my journey you’ve known that I’ve been trying to keep myself physically and emotionally healthy. I still have huge setbacks. Some weeks I’ll exercise 5 days/ week and some days I’ll exercise 1 day (like this past one during Avery’s birthday week). I appreciate SO much how endorphins make me feel and I loooove the way I feel after pushing through a workout. I set goals each time I lift weights and I try to max it out. Because doing something this week that I couldn’t do last week feels. freaking. amazing. Personal and quiet goals are pretty much where it’s at for me. (Click HERE for my best tips to start exercising. And HERE for how I helped my abs comes back together from having diastasis recti) BUT yeah, I’d rather not deal with the stress to get Avery and the twins ready to leave the house + drive 20 minutes each way to the gym (everyone fed + dressed). I’d rather not wake up Avery from her morning nap (or even skip her nap) to go exercise. I’d also rather stay home and clean OR get caught up on emails, social media commitments, and pushing out creative content, but I’ve accepted that this is an important safeguard for me to keep myself physically and mentally healthy while mothering 4 small kids with a hubby still in grad school full-time. The biggest lie I used to tell myself is, “I don’t have time”. And when I offered myself tough love by refusing to believe the lie, I began to find a way to get results. Here’s your tough love… If it’s a priority for you, you will find a way. At first, it felt impossible for me to create the time. We all have commitments and goals and family priorities to cram into 24 hours each day. To step it up I scheduled my exercise in my daily task list. I also write down exactly how I’m going exercise, what muscle groups I’m going work. Also, I set aside time to plan a few of my daily meals so that my nutrition would be on point. You CAN’T out exercise a bad diet, I promise. I knew that I wanted to feel good which meant both exercise and food needed my attention. By scheduling my workouts and having meals already planned I’ve been able to stay committed to myself. Keeping commitments to myself by doing what I tell myself I’ll do feels pretty amazing. I think that’s where I build quite a bit of my self-respect. Doing what I say I’ll do. Also, another big tool I use is to remind myself the purpose of what I’m doing. When I create a purpose behind the struggle everything becomes less difficult to do. Because I want that sacrifice. I want the results. Happy Tuesday, sweet friends! Hope you feel extra motivation to chase after those goals that set your heart on fire! xo
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